1) A great option for Father’s Day, the Tug Hill Bluegrass Festival is taking Lowville by storm this Friday, Saturday and Sunday at the Maple Ridge Center. The festival has an impressive lineup of bands this year, including the Atkinson Family, the Spinney Brothers, Doyle Lawson and Lost Time. Weekend passes are $60 and day rates are $30 Friday, $35 Saturday and a free-will donation Sunday. A Father’s Day chicken barbecue will conclude the weekend on Sunday at 12:30 p.m. For more information and a complete lineup, visit www.tughillbluegrass.com.

2) Nothing says summer quite like a delicious, ripe strawberry. Head to the Annual Strawberry Festival held at Sixtown Meetinghouse in Adams today from 10:30 a.m. to 7 p.m. and Saturday from 10:30 a.m. to 3 p.m. In addition to strawberries and numerous variations of strawberry-infused desserts, you can also enjoy a bake sale, chicken barbecue, craft sale and silent auction. The Meetinghouse is located at 33 E. Church St.

3) If you’re in the mood for live music at a good price, check out Drowning Pool tonight at the Alex T. Duffy Fairgrounds Arena in Watertown. Drowning Pool, a heavy metal quartet hailing from Texas, released its fifth studio album this year and is known for its support of the military, having toured Kuwait, Iraq, Korea and Guantanamo Bay. The show, which starts at 6:30 p.m. (doors 6 p.m.) will also feature Eye Empire, Even the Dead Love a Parade, Exilia, Caustic Method, Lake Effect Mud, Maps of War and Tyrade. Tickets are $19.94 and can be purchased at the door or on online.

4) Sample food and wine from more than 70 exhibitors at the Great NY State Food and Wine Festival today from 1 to 8 p.m., Saturday from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m. and Sunday from noon to 5 p.m. at the Cerow Recretion Park Arena (615 East Line Road) in Clayton. All of the products, which will include candies, cheeses, nuts, sauces, maple syrup, apple cider, cookies, and, of course, wines, are made in New York from vendors hailing from as far away as the north fork of Long Island. Tickets are only $5 for adults, $4 for military and $3 for children.

5) If you’re feeling outdoorsy, check out the Adirondack Mountain Club’s Spring Outing based at the SUNY Potsdam campus. In addition to an extensive schedule of hikes, paddling trips and biking excursions all over the Adirondacks on Friday, Saturday and Sunday, ranging from easy to strenuous, the weekend will also feature a planetarium show on Friday night and a concert by Adirondack folk musicians on Saturday night. The registration fee is $25 for adults and $5 for youth 18 and younger. You don’t have to be a member of the ADK to attend, and you don’t have to attend the full slate of weekend events, so pick and choose something that suits your whole family’s fitness level! Get the full schedule of events and pricing information here.

If you have an event you’d like to see featured in our weekly 5TF feature, send us the details.

Watertown Daily Times Archives

Looking for things for your kids to do over the summer? Do you want to learn to scuba dive or start a new activity?

The city of Watertown’s Parks and Recreation Department is expanding the kinds of programs and activities it will be offering this summer, for children and adults.

On Monday, the Watertown City Council approved the new programs. It also agreed on a fee structure for the activities and programs.

The new programs are adult kickball and volleyball leagues, a boot camp exercise program for adults, horseback riding, family yoga, children’s Zumba, scuba diving lessons, a youth running club and a fishing clinic.

The offerings also include such standbys as swimming, golf and tennis lessons, T-ball, youth baseball and adult softball leagues. The city’s three outdoor pools open June 24.

Parks and Recreation Superintendent Erin E. Gardner and her staff are still putting together the summer activities.

“We’re just excited to start off the season and offer things to do for the kids,” she said.

Most of the activities will be held at the Alex T. Duffy Fairgrounds off Coffeen Street. Some will begin later this month, but most of them will start in July, Mrs. Gardner said.

“Kickball is something that’s really popular in other communities, and I think will be here,” she said.

She said she hopes 10 to 12 adult teams will sign up for kickball, which most likely will start in August and continue into the fall.

Her staff is hiring instructors for the new programs and arranging for start times. For more details about descriptions, age requirements and how to register, she suggested going to the Parks Department’s website and Facebook.

As it has done for decades, the Parks Department is continuing a summer playground program, this year with four playgrounds and two rec centers opening June 24.

With a budget of $225,000, the Parks Department plans to hire about 48 summer seasonal employees. They include 24 to 30 lifeguards, 17 playground counselors and a person to handle athletic programs. It also hires instructors and coaches.

During Monday night’s meeting, council members also finalized the fees. They were introduced in May but revamped on council members’ instructions because they thought some programs would cost too much. They also wanted city residents to pay less than those who live outside the city.

T-ball and youth baseball will continue to be free for city residents, while those living outside Watertown will have to pay $20. Swimming lessons will cost $5 for Watertown residents and $20 for children living outside the city.

The fees for golf and tennis lessons for everyone are going up. Tennis will increase from $5 to $10 for Watertown residents and to $30 for those who live outside the city. Golf lessons will increase from $5 to $20 for city residents and to $50 for non-city residents.

The fishing clinic and children’s Zumba will cost $15 for city residents and $35 for non-city residents; family yoga, $10 and $35; youth running club, $5 and $20; scuba diving, $20 and $60; exercise boot camp, $20 and $50, and horseback riding, $20 and $60.

Mrs. Gardner took over the department last year after it had gone through some major financial problems under the former management team. She runs the department with program manager Celia E. Cook.

-Craig Fox, Watertown Daily Times

1.) Get the first taste of summer food at the Annual Clambake on Saturday from noon to 6 p.m. hosted by the Evan Mills Fire Department at 8615 Leray St. The menu will feature large steam clams, salt potatoes, clam chowder, sausage and steak sandwiches. There will also be a DJ and karaoke. Tickets cost $25 in advance or $35 at the door. Contact 486-1032 for more information.

2.) Enjoy hors d’oeuvres and wine at Night with the Authors at 6:30 p.m. tonight at the Lowville Free Library, 5387 Dayan St. The most recent titles for each author will be available for purchase. The event is free and open to all!

3.) Visit the Clayton Opera House (405 Riverside Dr.) on Sunday afternoon to listen to sibling duo Cheng2 perform an array of classical pieces on piano and cello. The concert is a partnership between the Thousand Islands Performing Arts Fund at the Clayton Opera House and the Cape Vincent Arts Council and is part of TIPAF’s Sidney T. Cox Memorial Concert Series sponsored by the Northern New York Community Foundation. Tickets are $10-20. Contact the Box Office at 686-2200 for more information or visit their website.

4.) Walk, shop, eat and meet artists of the Adirondacks at 1st Friday Art Walk in Old Forge. Tonight is the kickoff of the monthly event to run the first Friday of every month until Sept. 6. Follow this map of museums, art galleries and restaurants and get “stamped” to be entered into a monthly raffle. More information is here.

5.) Enjoy some history downtown at a Jefferson County Historical Society Heritage Day on Saturday from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. The event will feature the Highway Legends Car & Truck Club’s Classic Car Cruise-In and Antique Fire Trucks, as well as food, music, craft vendors, face painting, local authors and more. Admission is free so bring the whole family! The Historical Society is located at 228 Washington St. in Watertown.

A postcard dated June 26, 1907, shows the Oneida Community Home Building in Kenwood, N.Y., near Oneida. Photo courtesy Wikipedia.

There are few people today who have not used or at least heard of Oneida cutlery. The flatware is ubiquitous in restaurants, hotels and kitchen drawers worldwide. Since its founding in the 19th century, Oneida Limited flatware has become something of an American tradition, although its roots are anything but traditional.

The flatware was originally manufactured by the Oneida Community, a religious utopian commune based in Oneida between 1848 and 1880.

A man named John Humphrey Noyes led the group. He was born in Battleboro, Vt., in 1811 to John and Polly Noyes. His father was a businessman and United States Congressman. His mother was an ardently religious woman who had hopes that her son would one day pursue a religious vocation.

Though he lacked any real interest in religion as a young man, in order to placate his mother, Mr. Noyes agreed to attend a local revival meeting in 1828 led by the great revivalist preacher Charles Finney. Though initially unimpressed by the revival, within days of his return Mr. Noyes became gravely ill and was convinced of his imminent death. While he did recover, the experience served as a catalyst for a religious conversion that led him to enroll in Yale Divinity School with the aim of becoming a preacher.

Denied ordination by Yale due to controversial theories he developed regarding the nature of salvation, Mr. Noyes left the school to preach his newly minted religious philosophy. Between 1834 and 1837 he traveled throughout New England and New York looking for converts; he found none. By this time, his religious philosophy grew to include a number of unconventional beliefs, including the denunciation of marriage.

As part of his evangelization effort, Mr. Noyes published articles elucidating his beliefs in a local Vermont newspaper. The articles attracted the attention of a woman named Harriet Holton, the daughter of a well-to-do, politically connected Vermont family. Ms. Holton became interested in Mr. Noyes’s work, which she financially supported. In June 1838, Mr. Noyes proposed “spiritual marriage” to Ms. Holton, explaining that the marriage would have all the trappings of a traditional marriage without the “selfish possession of one another.”

Mr. Noyes’ marriage to Ms. Holton brought a financial windfall, which he used to buy a small publishing company. There he published a newsletter called “The Witness”— a tool he used to propagate his teachings.
A handful of students from a Bible school located in Putney, Vt., that Mr. Noyes established joined his religious group in 1840. Calling themselves the “Putney Association,” the group adopted communism in 1844. Members pooled their personal and family assets, including a $20,000 inheritance from Mr. Noyes’ father, to support the community. By this time, the group had grown to 37 members living together in three houses. They ran two farms and maintained a general store in Putney.

It was during this period that the community began to practice some of Mr. Noyes’ more controversial beliefs, including group marriage. While limited to the group’s leadership, the practice was sufficient to draw ire from locals who had Mr. Noyes indicted on charges of adultery. Having no interest in political martyrdom, Mr. Noyes’ quickly moved the community to Oneida, where he purchased 23 acres of land.

Following their relocation to New York, the group renamed itself the “Oneida Community.” In addition to personal property and assets of incoming members, the group supported itself through various agricultural and industrial endeavors. These would eventually include such a wide array of businesses as dentistry, the manufacture of leather bags, a silk mill and, of course, silverware.

By 1848 the group had 87 members, most of whom were now openly engaged in the controversial practices that led to Mr. Noyes’ prosecution in Vermont. In the Oneida Community, every man in the community was “married” to every woman, and while cohabitation between two people was allowed, an exclusive mutual attachment was not only discouraged but punished.

Birth control, still relatively uncommon in the Victorian period, was widely practiced among the group. Mr. Noyes justified the practice by citing the numerous difficult childbirths experienced by his wife, Harriet. During the years of the birth control policy’s implementation, roughly 1848-1868, only 40 children were born to a community that, during the time, had 250 members.

The Oneida Community members also submitted to regular “mutual criticism.” A practice Mr. Noyes championed as a means to ensure moral conformity among the group. Each member would be criticized publically for any perceived deviations from the community’s moral or social code.

The community continued to exist peacefully until 1876 when Mr. Noyes, wanting to retire to Connecticut, conferred his role as community leader to his son, Theodore. Lacking the charisma and religious conviction of his father, Theodore Noyes’ leadership quickly sowed seeds of discontent among the community.

By 1879 deep schisms within the community had formed. Eventually, opposition from the outside community to the groups’ progressive practices forced members to abandon the complex marriage system altogether. By 1880, the community’s various businesses and manufacturing assets were reorganized into a joint stock venture. By 1881 the community disbanded and Oneida Community Limited, eventually called Oneida Limited, was charged with managing the businesses.

Today, the 93,000-square-foot Oneida Community Mansion, begun in 1861, is both a National Historic Landmark and a museum that houses a collection of artifacts related to the Oneida Community.

-Lenka P. Walldroff is former curator of collections for the Jefferson County Historical Museum. She is a former museum specialist and conservator at the National Gallery of Art in Washington, D.C. She lives in Jefferson County with her husband and daughter. Her column appears in every issue.

Peggy DeYoung

Overlooking Clayton’s French Bay on Bartlett’s Point, this home is a retirement dream on a stretch of St. Lawrence River waterfront treasured by six generations of owners Rob and Sharron Grant’s family. The new home was built on the site of an original small cottage. When repairs became too great to tackle, it was torn down and plans for a new river home began.

The couple wanted to build a post-and-beam home, which would allow expansive views down river. They eventually decided to build a Lindal Cedar home. Lindal is based in Seattle and provides a package of building materials that includes posts and beams and windows and doors. Other materials were customized to the owners’ tastes and design needs and could be bought separately.

One of the first challenges was to determine if a full walk-out basement with a living space for their family and guests could be built. The sloping grass hill originally had 11 steps down to the water. The process not only revealed that there was enough height to build the walk-out basement, but just below the topsoil the site had beautiful limestone bedrock that is so prevalent along the river. The family now enjoys large areas of natural limestone defining the outdoor living space.

The living room has a soaring ceiling and angled prow windows that provide magnificent views down river and across the bay. The St. Lawrence River played a very significant and inspirational role in the design of this home. When confronted with the endless choices of building a home, the owner often took materials to the water’s edge to see how tones and colors mingled with natural shades of the river. The result is a careful blending of materials with nature.

Continuity continues into the interiors with slate flooring, soapstone countertops, knotty alder cabinetry and a blend of reclaimed red and white oak flooring in living spaces.
Function and durability were important when selecting furniture. A deep taupe leather sofa with lots of grain and texture was chosen for the living room. A favorite antique mission-style loveseat was recovered with Pendleton wool fabric.

“I kept returning to the deep blue grays of the river for fabric and rug selections in the bedrooms and loft” the owner said.

A retirement dream come true

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They also found an antique hickory twig-style dining table and chairs at the Thousand Islands Art Center antique show. While lighting is too often taken for granted in building projects, the selection of lights are unique and blend with the arts-and-craft style. It’s one of the details that make this home special and personal.

Aside from a river view, a floor-to-ceiling stone fireplace is a focal point in open living areas. It called for a special mantel.

The owners found the solution in Mark Schwartz when visiting a rustic show in Alexandria Bay. Mr. Schwartz likes to work with local timber from newly felled trees or trees cut by power companies. For this mantel, he found the perfect cedar tree on the property that had been cut down during excavation. After letting the tree age, the bark was carefully removed to expose the character left by wrinkles under branch joints, worm holes and knots. Mr. Schwartz was also able to create a one-of-a-kind newel post and powder room vanity from the same cedar tree.

With care and thought, this retirement dream became an efficient modern home deeply rooted in the north country’s heritage and natural environment.

-Peggy DeYoung is a nationally certified interior designer who owns the Porch and Paddle Cottage Shop in Clayton. Contact her at deerrun@twcny.rr.com.

Photographer: Patrick Danforth/Evans Mills
Media: Digital photograph
Camera: Nikon D7000, ISO 200f/5.6 1/600 145mm
Date: Winter 2012
Photographer’s notes: Here is Max, a German shepherd, and Alyson. Max stayed with us at Click to Zen Canine Behavioral Services for training while his rescue searched for a foster home. He was going to be put to sleep in a shelter in Brooklyn. Here he enjoys pulling Alyson on a sled. He loved pulling people on skis, a kick sled and mountain boards. He eventually found a foster home and was adopted.
Editor’s note: Mr. Danforth’s photo won the 2013 Watertown Daily Times Cabin Fever Photo Contest in the outdoor recreation category.

Give us your best image. If you have captured a snippet of NNY through your lens or on canvas, email it to us at nnyliving@wdt.net.

Chicken orecchiette, a recipe from Massena's Vino Vidi Vici. Photo courtesy Crista Makdouli/Vino Vidi Vici.

Chicken orecchiette is one of those dishes we love to serve for every reason. It’s a signature entrée that provides guests with a full dining experience each time they order it.

For us, opening a new restaurant in the north country has been a process of both trial and error and slow and steady growth. This dish has illustrated that on many levels. It also has shown the success of what we have worked hard to create in the heart of Massena.

As many permanent menu items begin, it started as a featured special. When Chef Michael Austin first prepared it for us, we knew it was a winner from the very first bite. It had such a unique depth of flavor and captured everything people love about a great pasta dish. The chicken was beautifully marinated and grilled to perfection, and the sauce was perfect — not too heavy and not too light. It is ideal for those times when you’d love the richness of an Alfredo sauce, but don’t want its heavy feel.

The chiffonade of fresh spinach atop the chicken is the fun part of this dish that stands out. It may seem like something insignificant when up against stronger ingredients such as sundried tomatoes and roasted red peppers, but it really does complete the dish.

Fresh spinach has such a unique flavor and texture. The bite and flavor give just a subtle hint of something different. The sundried tomato butter lends a balanced richness that satisfies without overpowering. It’s not a heavy sauce, but the richness and depth of flavors will impress with that in mind. The roasted red peppers and shallots come into play, too, lending a delicious sweetness.

Chicken orecchiette is surely one of our family favorites. We hope it becomes a favorite for your family, too.

[For the recipe and instructions for Vino Vidi Vici's famous chicken orecchiette, please subscribe or purchase a copy of NNY Living at your local Big M Supermarket, at the Watertown Daily Times, Carthage Tribune or Lowville Journal offices and the Samaritan Medical Center Gift Shop.]

-Crista and Tarek Makdouli own and operate Vino Vidi Vici in Massena, serving upscale casual Italian fare. Visit them at 160 Harte Haven Plaza or online at www.VinoVV.com. Call 769-5050 for delivery or reservations.

Melissa Shelmidine sits at the life guarding station at the Watertown Family YMCA in downtown Watertown. After being an active swimmer and life guard, she had to have her left foot amputated due to complications from arteriovenous malformation. Photo by Amanda Morrison/NNY Living.

Melissa R. Shelmidine just wanted to live a normal life.

“I wanted it done. I practically begged a doctor to do it,” she said, Miss Shelmidine, a mother of two active, young children, a swimmer and a former high school athlete is, at the age of 24, learning how to get back up and running after having her left foot amputated.  Miss Shelmidine was born with an abnormal connection between the arteries and veins in her foot, an abnormality called arteriovenous malformation. The condition went undetected for most of her childhood, getting progressively more painful and debilitating into her teen years.

“What would happen is it would cut off circulation to parts of my foot. It was so painful,” she said.

The condition left her toes swollen, numb and discolored, lacking blood circulation. She eventually opted to have her big toe amputated, hoping it would relieve some of the pain. Her foot never properly healed.

“I had my toe amputated, but I also had more than a dozen embolizations done to try to minimize the problem,” Miss Shelmidine said. “Nothing was helping. So I met with my doctor and talked about having the foot taken off.”

Ninety percent of people with AVM have it in their brains. Though she suffered through her toes dying due to loss of circulation, she considers herself lucky.  Losing one’s foot seems traumatic and scary; Miss Shelmidine is upbeat about the life that follows her surgery. She talks about the amputation surgery as if it’s a dental cleaning. The surgery itself took less than two hours.

“My children understood the pain that I was in, that I couldn’t run around with them because of the pain in my foot, so they understood when I told them that I was going to be getting a new leg,” she said. “When I was at home recovering, my prosthesis hadn’t come yet and my daughter was a little confused and asked where my new leg was.”

Miss Shelmidine said she does not regret her decision.

“I didn’t have any depression, nothing. It’s been great. I was just so happy to get rid of it,” she said.

She had two months to prepare for the surgery and met with an amputee who had lost part of his leg in an accident. Roger Howard, owner of Howard Orthotics and Prosthetics, introduced the two.

“I felt like I knew what to expect and I knew it would only get better,” she said.

Prior to surgery, Miss Shelmidine was a swim instructor and lifeguard at the Downtown Watertown Family YMCA, where she worked since 2007. Losing part of her leg didn’t stop her from getting back in the pool.

“I had the surgery in December and a few weeks later Brooke [Jamieson, the Watertown Family YMCA aquatics director] called me and said they were doing recertifications and said that we could try it,” Miss Shelmidine said. “I said, ‘why not?’ and I ended up getting back in the pool and passing my recertification.”

Miss Jamieson said seeing her colleague back in the pool was nothing short of amazing.

“I walked in thinking that I was going to have to help her in the pool or lift her up, but when I walked in she was in there doing laps,” she said. “It was just so awesome.”

The atmosphere at the Downtown Y was invigorating, Miss Shelmidine said. She recently took the position of front desk supervisor and is walking unassisted, “except for long distances, I use just one crutch still, until my permanent prosthesis is here.”

“The people at the Y are so great. My last day here before surgery I cried the entire day. People, both staff and members, came up and hugged me and wished me luck. They were so encouraging.”

Miss Jamieson said that the Y is happy to have its former swim instructor back.

“Melissa and I grew up with the Y, we went to preschool together, so I was 100 percent behind her and want her to have a better quality of life,” she said.

Miss Jamieson said “Watertown Family YMCA” is more than a name.

“We really are a family here, we support each other every day,” she said.

Miss Shelmidine said that she’s looking forward to her permanent prosthesis, one that is less bulky and stiff than the one she currently has. Recovery from the approximately 90-minute surgery that took her lower leg has gone quickly and effortlessly.

“There’s one thing you have to remind yourself of, which is that you can’t just get out of bed and take off running, you have to put your leg on first,” Miss Shelmidine said with a smile. “If the kids need something in the middle of the night, just remember to put your leg on first.”

-Kyle R. Hayes is associate editor for NNY Living. Contact him at 661-2381 or khayes@wdt.net. 

The George Eastman House International Museum of Photography and Film. Gardens surround the house that was once owned by Mr. Eastman, the founder of Eastman Kodak.

Rochester is a city built on innovation. A cornerstone of the regional economy, Kodak’s global headquarters, Eastman Kodak, has called this Western New York city home since the early 1900s. Xerox and Bausch & Lomb are among dozens of other companies whose roots are planted in Rochester. Creative individuals who have convened in the Flower City have helped make each tiny neighborhood unique and inviting throughout.

Speaking of neighborhoods — and suburbs for that matter — Rochester has a ton of them. From the uber trendy Park Avenue neighborhood to the affluent Erie Canal village of Pittsford, each offers something different and caters to various clienteles. Want a night on the town without having to drive from a restaurant to a nightclub? Hit the East End. Looking for a good cup of coffee, local foods, hip cafés and shops the cool kids visit? The Southwedge is your place.

For a time-crunched weekend away, Rochester’s east side offers plenty of options. From museums that even children won’t complain about to dining options you’ll want to write home about and shopping and sightseeing that will be worth getting lost in the city’s side streets, there’s something for everyone.

2 P.M. FRIDAY, STICKY LIPS AND FULL STOMACHS
When navigating your 36 hours in Rochester, especially if you’re sticking to the city’s eastside, two major routes will get you in and out of the city and to all points in between: East Avenue and I-490.

Before you even check in at the hotel, you’ll be hungry for some lunch. Stay on I-490 after you exit the Thruway to Exit 20/University Avenue and make a right onto Culver Road. Your destination is the original Sticky Lips BBQ Restaurant. Everything from pulled pork plates to some of the best barbecue chicken that’s ever been made, Sticky Lips is unforgettable. Make sure to start your experience with fried green tomatoes and deep fried pickles.

You’ll be glad you did.

Original Sticky Lips Restaurant, 625 Culver Road, Rochester, www.stickylipsbbq.com, 1 (585) 288-1910

3:30 P.M. FRIDAY, ENJOY YOUR STAY
If you’re looking for downtown city living during your stay, go with the Rochester Plaza Hotel and Conference Center. You will be within walking distance of the heart of the city.

However, for this trip, Del Monte Lodge Renaissance Rochester Hotel & Spa is the temporary residence of choice. Located in the nearby suburb of Pittsford, the Del Monte is tucked away off Pittsford’s Main Street and feels like a big city boutique hotel with the amenities of Marriott brand backing.

The Del Monte Lodge Renaissance Rochester Hotel & Spa, 41 N. Main St., Pittsford, www.marriott.com, 1 (585) 381-9900

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5 P.M. FRIDAY, TAKE A STROLL
Pittsford is a beautiful little town right on the historic Erie Canal. The entire village is pedestrian friendly, from downtown shops to canal side ice cream parlors and sitting areas. It’s a quiet picturesque village that offers a lot.
Grab a cup of coffee at Village Bakery and Cafe, a true treat, or stroll into Pittsford Pub and enjoy a cocktail before dinner.

Walk down the canal side trail and bike path that winds through the village for a perfect way to end a day of travel and take in some new sights.

Village Bakery & Cafe, 5 State St., Pittsford, www.villagebakeries.com, 1 (585) 203-1311; Pittsford Pub, 60 N. Main St., Pittsford, www.thepittsfordpub.com, 1 (585) 586-4650

[Editor's note: This is a truncated version of this story. For the full version, please see NNY Living in print or subscribe.]

Kyle Hayes is associate editor for NNY Living. Contact him at 661-2381 or khayes@wdt.net.

Boo Wells

In the book I have yet to write: “The World According to Boo,” there are two distinctly different types of people. There is the group of people who make New Year’s resolutions to exercise daily, drink more water and avoid dairy products. They also tend to give things up for Lent, like chocolate, wine and coffee. This is the group that promises to “be better” at every chance: they work out, eat right, get enough sleep and are always well put together. Wonder Woman belongs to this group.

Then there is the group that gives up nothing, pledges to change nothing and basically ignores the whole silly mess because they know they will never stick to whatever it is they pledged anyway. This group has come to face the fact that they are unwilling — though incapable might be a better word — to give up the foods they love, sweat in public and be labeled “crabby” because they have a little trouble waking up in the morning. I’m sure you can guess which group of people I fit into.

I stopped trying to be Wonder Woman several years ago. She is just too much work, so I lowered my expectations for myself and decided to focus exclusively on being “Mom of the Year.” Little did I know, Mom of the Year is an incredibly labor intensive title to maintain. There are countless school activities that require work: bake sales to contribute to, field trips that need chaperones, fundraisers that require solicitation of coworkers, family members, neighbors and people you don’t even know or like. If that’s not enough, add in the little darling’s sporting events, plays, musicals, band recitals and poetry readings to cheer at and beam appropriately. Then there are the diminutive items that mostly go unnoticed at home. The clean clothes and matched socks placed on the end of the bed every morning (just kidding), the constant supply of freshly made chocolate chip cookies — usually still warm from the oven when they get off the school bus; homemade lunches with each child’s favorite foods, family dinners at the table with cloth napkins and candles — no TV dinners or paper napkins for the children of Mom of the Year.

I have recently had the chance to rethink my life goals. Wonder Woman, a crown that always seemed so unattainable, so much work, so difficult to maintain, is starting to look like a pretty reasonable gig.

Flan, a delicious custard with caramel topping. Photo by Amanda Morrison/NNY Living.

My moment of clarity began with a brilliant school project that required my second born, Patrick, to produce and film a cooking demonstration on how to make the Spanish dessert, flan. Patrick is very capable in the kitchen, so with a moderate degree of difficulty I refrained from micro-managing the project. My sole responsibility for this endeavor was to deliver the completed flan to school the next day by noon. How hard could that be?
On said flan delivery day, I decided it was time to start a little exercise routine. Maybe a brisk walk first thing in the morning should become part of my day,  I thought.

After driving the darlings to school I changed into walking clothes and proceed to get distracted by the millions of things that needed doing around the house. At 11:45 a.m. it became apparent that if I did not get out for my walk immediately it was never going to happen, so off I charged, music pumping and head held high. I walked a mile or so and at 12:01 p.m. arrived at their school.

That’s when it hit me: the flan was meant to be delivered to the school at noon. Panic ensued and I did what every Mother of the Year would do: I turned around and started running for home. I though about hitchhiking, explaining to whomever picked me up that I was not in the habit of taking rides from strangers but these were desperate circumstances. No cars passed, so I kept running. In true Mother of the Year fashion I made it back to the school, flan in hand by 12:18, winded, smelly and disheveled.

I realize now that if I had chosen the Wonder Woman route all these years, I would have been in much better shape for life’s little challenges — but then again, maybe Wonder Woman and Mother of the Year aren’t really separate — maybe, just maybe, they are actually the same girl.

[For the recipe and instructions for making Boo's fabulous flan please subscribe or purchase a copy of NNY Living at your local Big M Supermarket, at the Watertown Daily Times, Carthage Tribune or Lowville Journal offices and the Samaritan Medical Center Gift Shop.]

-Boo Wells is chef and owner of the Farm House Kitchen, a catering company and cooking school in Sackets Harbor. Contact her at sacketsfarmhousekitchen@gmail.com or www.thefarmhousekitchen.com.